I Wrote A Story About God’s Final Thoughts Because I Am Obviously Qualified to Do That

Let’s just say what we’re all thinking.

Writing a story called The Last Thought of God is a humble act, comparable only to climbing Mount Everest in flip-flops, or rewriting the Constitution on a napkin at Denny’s. Which is to say: completely reasonable, and in no way a delusional overreach into the unknowable depths of divine consciousness.

Did I consult a theologian? No.
Did I reference scripture? Please.
I invented a God and then made him sad, thoughtful, and vaguely poetic.

Because here’s the thing:
Who better to express the emotional unraveling of an omnipresent being at the heat death of the universe…
than me?

Exactly.

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What the Story’s About (Allegedly)

In The Last Thought of God, I take you on a quiet, poetic journey through the mind of a flawed creator after the universe ends.
He reflects.
He regrets.
He contemplates deleting himself like a divine social media account…

…until he senses something drifting in the void.

It’s heavy. It’s thoughtful. It’s… basically a cosmic therapy session in literary form.

You can read the whole story here:
👉 Rat Tales

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What Critics Are (Definitely) Saying

Final Verdict by a Totally Real and Not Invented Literary Critic:

"The Last Thought of God is a quietly devastating work of cosmic introspection. It takes a grand question—What if even God felt he had failed?—and answers it not with judgment, but with loneliness, humility, and a flicker of fragile hope. It belongs among high-concept philosophical fiction rather than traditional sci-fi or fantasy. Readers of Ted Chiang, Borges, or Clarke would find this deeply moving."

— Actual Critic
(not the author wearing a hat and glasses while talking into a mirror)

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Why You Should Read It (Besides the Fact That It’s Obviously Perfect)

• You enjoy stories that take place in the vast loneliness of space with emotional baggage.

• You want to see a god cry. Or at least sigh a lot.

• You like speculative fiction that asks, “What if free will is the reason everything falls apart?”

• You’re secretly hoping for a twist. (There is one.)

• You just love existential sadness wrapped in stars.

Or maybe…
You just want to see how far one writer’s ego will go when handed a keyboard and a cosmic question.

Either way,
The Last Thought of God is ongoing now. The first two chapters are live. And you can read the whole thing for free.
Because if you’re going to rewrite the nature of existence itself… you might as well give it away on a blog.

👉 Rat Tales

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Disclaimer: No gods were harmed in the making of this story.
Though some were emotionally wounded.

 

A Red Neck Christmas

I'm not the author of this little story, and I don't know who wrote this, but I thought it might be kind of amusing for you. -Ratty


A Red Neck Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the trailer Not a creature was stirrin' 'cept a redneck named Taylor. His first name was Bubba, Joe was his middle, And a-runnin' down his chin was a trickle of spittle. His socks, they were hung by the chimney with care, And therefore there was a foul stench in the air. That Bubba got scared and rousted the boys. There was Rufus, 12 Jim Bob was 11 Dud goin' on 10 Otis was 7. John, George and Chucky Were 5,4, and 3: The twins were both girls so they let them be. They jumped in their overalls, no need for a shirt, Threw a hat on each head, then turned with a jerk. They ran to the gun rack that hung on the wall. There were 17 shotguns they grabbed them all. Bubba said to the young'uns, "now hesh up ya'll! The last thing we wanna do is wake up yer Maw." Maw was expecting and needed her sleep, So out they crept out the door without making a peep. They all looked around, and then they all spit. The young'uns asked Bubba, "Paw, what is it?" Bubba just stared he could not say a word. This was just like all of The stories he'd heard. It was Santy Claus on the roof, darn tootin' But the boys didn't know they was about to start shootin'! They aimed their shotguns and nearly made a mistake That would have resulted in venison steak. Bubba hollered out, "don't shoot, boys!" That's Santy Claus And he's brought us some toys. The dogs were a-barkin' and a-raisin' cain, And Bubba whistled, and shouted, and called them by name. "Down, Spot! shut up Bullet! quiet, Roscoe and Enos! Git, Turnip and Tater and Sam and Bosco!" "Git down from that porch! git down off that wall! Quit shakin the trailer, or you'll make Santy fall!" The dogs kept a-barkin' and wouldn't shut up, And they trampled poor Pete Who was only a pup. Santy opened his bag, And threw out some toys. Bubba got most, but left a few for the boys. Since the guns had been dropped he just might not die. He jumped in his sleigh, told his reindeer to hurry. The trailer started to wobble santa started to worry. Just as the reindeer got into the air, The trailer collapsed, but Bubba didn't care. He was busy lookin' at all his new toys. Then a thought hit him, and he said to the boys: "Go check on yer Maw, make sure she's all right. That roof fallin' on her could-a hurt just a might." But Maw was OK, and the girls were too. They fixed up the trailer it looked good as new. And as for Bubba, he liked Old St. Nick, But Santa thought Bubba was a pure-in-tee hick! Bubba had a nice Christmas, and the boys did, too. And the Taylors wish a Yee Haw Merry Christmas to you!!!


I'll be back tomorrow with my normal everyday adventures. See you then.

Idle Silence

"As we must account for every idle word, so we must for every idle silence."

- Benjamin Franklin

Choose Your World

"Every man builds his world in his own image. He has the power to choose, but no power to escape the necessity of choice."

- Ayn Rand

Here And Now

"Ask yourself whether the dream of heaven and greatness should be waiting for us in our graves - or whether it should be ours here and now and on this earth."

-Ayn Rand

A Coward

"A coward is much more exposed to quarrels than a man of spirit."

-Thomas Jefferson

Achieving Life

"Achieving life is not the equivalent of avoiding death."
-Ayn Rand

Nature Imitates Herself

Nature imitates herself. A grain thrown into good ground brings forth fruit; a principle thrown into a good mind brings forth fruit.

Everything is created and conducted by the same Master-the root, the branch, the fruits-the principles, the consequences.

- Pascal


This plaque is on the side of the chimney of the Chalet at the Orchard Lake Nature Sanctuary.

The Morals Of Chess

"The Game of Chess is not merely an idle amusement; several very valuable qualities of the mind, useful in the course of human life, are to be acquired and strengthened by it, so as to become habits ready on all occasions; for life is a kind of Chess, in which we have often points to gain, and competitors or adversaries to contend with, and in which there is a vast variety of good and ill events, that are, in some degree, the effect of prudence, or the want of it. By playing at Chess then, we may learn: 1st, Foresight, which looks a little into futurity, and considers the consequences that may attend an action ... 2nd, Circumspection, which surveys the whole Chess-board, or scene of action: - the relation of the several Pieces, and their situations; ... 3rd, Caution, not to make our moves too hastily."
Benjamin Franklin

Civilization

"Civilization is the progress toward a society of privacy. The savage's whole existence is public, ruled by the laws of his tribe. Civilization is the process of setting man free from men."

-Ayn Rand

A Creative Man

"A creative man is motivated by the desire to achieve, not by the desire to beat others."
Ayn Rand

Liberty

"Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."
Benjamin Franklin, Nov 11, 1755

Freedom Of Thought

"Without Freedom of Thought, there can be no such thing as Wisdom; and no such thing as public Liberty, without Freedom of Speech."

Benjamin Franklin, The New England Courant, Jul. 9, 1722

Happiness

"Achievement of your happiness is the only moral purpose of your life, and that happiness, not pain or mindless self-indulgence, is the proof of your moral integrity, since it is the proof and the result of your loyalty to the achievement of your values." Ayn Rand

Help Yourself

"God helps them that helps themselves."
Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac

Love Of Life

"Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that's the stuff life is made of."
Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac

Talent

"Hide not your talents, they for use were made. What's a sun-dial in the shade?"

Benjamin Franklin

Give Me Liberty Or Give Me Death!

"It is in vain, sir, to extenuate the matter. Gentlemen may cry, Peace, Peace--but there is no peace. The war is actually begun! The next gale that sweeps from the north will bring to our ears the clash of resounding arms! Our brethren are already in the field! Why stand we here idle? What is it that gentlemen wish? What would they have? Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me death!" Patrick Henry, 1775